Nikki Russell, Recovery Programs Coordinator
June 4, 2024
I used to believe I had no unique gifts or talents to offer the world. I lamented the belief that happiness could not be found in my work; it had to be uncovered in my hobbies. Work was to be something I trudged through to get a paycheck utterly separate from my authenticity. As I forged a path through the business world, I gained many external accolades from my professional environment that fulfilled a sense of accomplishment but did not replenish my heart.
I had a deep desire to promote human welfare. I understood the suffering in the world; the wounding I experienced made me sensitive to it. I put being a humanitarian on a bucket list and carried on with business as usual. It is interesting how the universe attempted to show me my purpose, bringing me people who needed support. When I look back, it is crystal clear that my work in this life is to be a bridge to hope. The mask I wore hid the pain of my childhood, yet the people who had soul resonance with my suffering saw right through the mask and showed up in droves. As I sought, trudged, and dug for my destined career path, I did not see what was in plain sight; my most genuine desire hid behind pain and a life I was constructing to appear satisfied.
The road less traveled always felt dangerous because it meant following my heart, which usually led to aloneness. I was a closet addict; my happiness facade was worth not going through the pain of rejection, and the people who showed up for support represented "the me" I was trying to suppress. My artificial life triggered the authentic girl inside that, yes, had much pain but desperately needed to heal. With each year that passed, it became more and more painful to live a counterfeit life. It manifested as the abandonment of everything I created in an attempt to avoid the pain of my past. Addiction, the major destructor of life, leaves in its trail nothing except a spec of oneself that, if willing, will be used to rebuild a life of authenticity.
That spec meant everything to me; it held a second chance at life. The opportunity to be brave and courageous and walk down the road less traveled. Hope is an exciting experience because it shines the light of a bright future but holds everything a person needs to heal to get there. It says, "If you're willing to face some pretty unappealing facts about yourself, then the truth will not be withheld." Hope is the seed of the authentic life, but it only comes with much work. The gut-wrenching process called recovery opened my heart and led me on my destined path. My traumatic childhood, the years spent running from it, and the destruction of the mask was for a great purpose. My life meant more than I could have imagined; my lived experience could provide hope to somebody who didn't know grace was possible. Grace is a natural flow with what life offers, good, bad, or ugly, and finding the strength to see, feel, and release it.
With recovery came an examination of life experiences instead of investments in beliefs. I had developed a belief about myself and how I felt I needed to function in the world to be accepted. Knowing myself came with authenticity and the development of strength, resiliency, and courage to live without needing to fit in. I have discovered that I was not created to mold or conform to the masses. I was made to model recovery and compassion even in the face of those who deny me their approval. This understanding does not mean that all of a sudden, my life is problem-free; in fact, the opposite is true. The world has not changed, but my inner experience has. Becoming a Certified Peer Support Specialist validates my recovery experience and allows me the freedom to live a life that aligns with my soul, yet it does not always match up with the belief system of the world. Today, I am honored to face my fears, trembling and shaking, to validate an inner voice alive and well with something to add to life's dialogue.
My experience working as a Peer Support Specialist has evolved me into my authentic self. It has challenged the unhealed parts of me and demanded growth. Peer Support is about learning to stand in your power during the storms of emotions arising from past memories. Peer Support is a mirror that reflects your most tremendous human potential. It allows you to find yourself beyond the wounding, symptoms, and masks. We learn skills that we perform professionally, like DAP notes, recovery planning, and system regulations. Still, our actual value lies in our lived experience. It cannot be taught in exchange for a degree, systemized for protocol, or used as a treatment for mental health. It is not thought-based or a concept to be published. It cannot be traded for money, healing, or wisdom because it is experiential. It is so good that it cannot be measured, weighed, or theorized. It is the last of its kind, and professional systems and education cannot reproduce the awe-inspiring, gut-wrenching, and spirit-stretching that the experience of a Peer Supporter must deliver.
The expected job growth in the addiction field is anticipated to grow by 18% from 2022-2032 (Best Colleges, 2024). The addiction recovery field has evolved to include Peer-based services and recovery-oriented systems of care that extend the continuum of care and allow people to establish long-term sobriety. A Peer Support Specialist in Montana exists under the Behavioral Health umbrella, enhancing traditional treatment models with evidence-based practices. The road less traveled on the Peer Support Specialist path provides the magic that treatments, interventions, and medications cannot provide. Remember how vital you are to the recovery movement.
Choosing a career as a Certified Behavioral Health Peer Support Specialist is more than just a valid choice-it's a deeply impactful one. This role uniquely harnesses the power of lived experience to foster recovery, dismantle stigma, and cultivate more vital, more empathetic communities. As a CBHPSS, you play a pivotal role in society, offering a meaningful and fulfilling career path for those committed to aiding others on their recovery journey. By embarking on this career, you become an indispensable part of the community, bolstering its resilience and strength (This paragraph generated by Chat GPT, 2024).