by Ty LaFountain, Recovery Support Coordinator
November 12, 2024
Today, before I act, I often ask myself what kind of role model do I want to be today? Six years ago, before I was in recovery, I never gave this much thought, or any thought really. I also didn’t realize the effect that my actions had on those around me, especially people like my nieces or nephews. I was about two years in recovery and was hanging out with my 12-year-old nephew, we were talking about life when he looked at me and said “Uncle Ty, do you remember when I wouldn’t share my taco with you one time, and you grabbed it and smashed it? You used to be mean!” I was absolutely blown away and devastated at the same time. I never realized the impact I had on him or the negative role model I was being. It was at that point in my life I decided from that point on I was going to be a positive role model for him and all the people around me.
Now, I wish I could say that I immediately became this great person that was this great role model, however, it typically doesn’t work like that. I had to make a conscious decision to work on and change some of my habits. This included the smallest details that turned out to make the biggest difference. From changing my language and the way that I talked to just putting away the shopping cart at the grocery store. I was told that changing these small things would carry over to every aspect of my life. I began to pray every morning, just for guidance to better be a humble servant. And my life began to change. Pretty soon I was not just taking the grocery cart back at the store but I found myself at my neighbors houses helping them with odds and end things. I found my attitude about life in general had changed. Rather than negativity at every corner, I began to see positivity at every corner. And I don’t mean that I turned into a person that just saw the positive in everything, because I went through some dark times and still do. But the way that I handled those situations began to change. My father passed away about 6 months ago, and I was able to be the strong person in that situation that people like my nephew and my little brother and sister could lean on. I was able to actually be there. Which, until 6 years ago, I had not.
In becoming this person that people can count on I have been able to repair many relationships that I had ruptured while I was struggling with my co-occurring disorders. I saw that moment, when my nephew felt comfortable enough to share that experience with me and how that felt for him, as a positive. I also saw that moment as an opportunity to show him that people can change and don’t have to be defined by their past. I have been able to model to him and to people across the country what recovery means to me. Which is a lifestyle, that is not something that I just do here or there, but is something I must practice in all my affairs, for if I don’t, I can be right back to where I was 6 years ago.
When I hear people tell me how proud they are of me, especially those who have seen me at my worst, and people tell me I am an inspiration, it feels amazing and lets me know that all my hard work is paying off. For, I am possibly giving hope to the hopeless. When I have peers that I have supported as a peer support specialist tell me they want to become peer support specialists, it tells me that I have done something right and modeled peer support and recovery in such a way that I am able to inspire others to do the same. These are the reasons that I do what I do! To inspire and instill hope in others and to plant seeds and watch them grow. It is this type of role model that I would like to be today! If you see someone modeling recovery today, tell them you are proud of them, for it may make their day and let’s them know you see them and the hard work they put in everyday!
What kind of role model do you want to be today?